virginity

[KaMrAn1]

Originally posted by Mahbuba
I just wanted to tell you b.commers this because I don't know, I know I will never get to see you, and if I do tell you, you will tell me your honest opinion.

At the age of 6, 7, and 8, I don't know what else I would call it without knowing what's going inside of me, as in the 4 different guys' penis (sorry for the terminology).

Bang_Ali, I wouldn't consider it rape, it's abusement which a little girl didn't know what it was. I will still call it sexual abuse, I don't think I would call it a rape. Rape is when you are forced to do something that you don't want to do. I was forced to do it, but I didn't know what 'he' was doing, that's all.
I don't think I could had done anything at that age, because then all the parents will gather around and call me crazy. These 4 boys knew that I was a shy girl and I wouldn't open my mouth to anything.
Around the year 1987 and 88, I think everyone in my family would have kept everything on a hush hush point.

I told my counselor this at the age of 9 and again at the age of 12 in my junior high school, but they weren't going to help, because my mom was like "tauba tauba, sis sis, itha kitha mathos, thui amar furi nai"...something of that sort.

I went to Bangladesh and saw 2 of my cousins who did that to me when I was young, and I felt like smacking them, but I didn't say anything because, "why say now, when it happened long ago, and I don't have proof of it, who will believe me?"

Just remember Bang_Ali, the things that happened to me, happens to thousands of little girls in Bangladesh, without any hesitation.

SnoOp, how can you have "mates" who had done it to other girls? You shouldn't consider them your mates then. Only if you want to. Not my problem.

Sweetiepie83, it's already too late. I was 6,7, and 8 then, and now I am 23 years old. If I open my mouth now, nothing will happen. Everyone will stare at me, and no one will believe me.

And, "yes" I was talking about that in the "adultry" section. I did ask Allah to forgive them, because I know Allah will forgive me becuase it wasn't my fault.

Anyway, guys and girls, if someone physically abused or sexually abused one of children, what actions will you take?

The reason my mom and i didn't take any actions because of SOCIETY. Society is within all of us. And, I hate that sh1t. If I have a child and if she or he was abused, I would get him arrested and let the law see what should be done with him and ask Allah for mercy.

=0/

Shouldnt u be askin about advise n support rather than askin about whose virgin ere, why do u wanna know whose virgin ere? i tink ur a fake,makin all dis up. I dont know how coz u werent developed fully that time. Anyway i if ur real feel sorry 4 u, i tink they should be locked up, they r dangerous sick lowlifes. How old were those guys?

Let me tell u ma story might make u feel betta, wen i was a young boy,older women used 2 allow me 2 touch dere boobs and other body parts which i wouldnt say it ere, i loved it. If u wanna more plz say




[Edited by KaMrAn1 on 9th December 2003 at 00:52]

[Mahbuba]

Sweetiepie83, you are a very strong woman! Hopefully there are more Bengali mothers like you, but there aren't.

Aga_kha, when I read the English Qu'ran, I learn knew things everyday that the Arabic Qu'ran didn't allow me to understand that there is something called "forgiving even if it is the worst". And, Sweetiepie83 might not agree with me on that part, since she wants pay back =0). I was like her as well but I thought that it will not give me my virginity back, that's all. Also, I don't talk to the same cousins because they are in Bangladesh and I am here in New York. When I went to Bangladesh, I just felt uncomfortable, that's all, and didn't speak with them either. OMG, you should be careful next time, and not use that allyway someway or the other. Walk with a friend and don't walk alone.

LOL Safiah, you still remember me telling you that my brother beat me up? Well, my brother picks on the weaker. I am not good at fighting, but I do fight back for self-defense. One day I was so angry that I told my boyfriend to beat up my brother and he said that he will do it with a passion, but then I told him "forget it, it will cause more harm to my parents and I, in one way or the other, since my brother brain washes my parents sometimes and they fall for it.

Well, Kiya; I don't know if they changed or not. I know my Dad's older brother's son (one of the abuser) is going to go to Medical School in England. And, the other one is my mother's sister's son who has his bachelor's of arts but he is an unemployed entreprenuer, so I had heard. Also, the two servants who did it was from my house in Sylhet and the neighbor's house in Sylhet; I have no idea where they are; last thing I heard was one of them stole my Dad's sandles and ran away. Also, there was this driver for our car, he used to do things with me, I don't know what I would call it, but one thing is "it's with his fingers and my private part", how sickening. Another one is my "fufa/pupa" (my Dad's sister's husband) who had fingered me in the dark when I was 7. I only told my boyfriend and my cousin (her father who did it) and she said her father did something like that to her as well. I was like "Whaaa?"
My mom thought I was nuts. She told the counselor in front of my face that the boys were my age, but they were 10-15 years older than I. It's not my mom's fault because she was in shock. Maybe she didn't know how to react to this kind of a problem.
I can't speak out Kiya. I know there are other little girls are being abused, but I'm not at the right class to protect them, not as of yet. Some of my best friends and I are thinking about opening up an organization for women and abusing. And, the friends who will help me out are "men". My women friends will not help me out because they don't want to show their face in the Bengali society.
I can't open my mouth, not as of yet. It will bring corruption in my family and my family comes first before anything else.

Aww, Star I wish I had a brother like you. Once, I told my brother that I was abused when I was little. Few days later we got into an argument and he said in anger, "you "F...in" "B...h", you are a "s..ut". The next day I told him that whatever I told him the other day was to test him if he was going to appreciate me as a sister or not and you had proved that you don't consider me as your sister. Then, I told him that whatever I told you was a lie because I wanted to test you. I'm afraid to tell a lot of people.

I told my "female" cousins, because the male ones are wayyyy younger than I. Now, that I don't talk to one of the female cousins, and she hates me with passion for some reason, I have no idea what. I'm afraid she might try to blackmail me with my past.

I was a stupid girl for telling anyone who was nice to me.

Sweetsista, my boyfriend hasn't laid one hand on me yet, except to kiss me or hug me. It is truely my brother who has beaten me up. Why wouldn't you believe that it was my brother. He is merely 3 years younger than me, at the age of 20, now. He is mature enough to know what's right from wrong.
I don't want to say it's my boyfriend???? You are mistaken. Why are you keep on blaming my boyfriend on the fact that who beat me up and who didn't. If I say it's my brother, it is him. My boyfriend lives 1000 miles away from me, how in the world is he going to beat me up? Sweety, are you okay or are you on something?
I'm not on denial!
I don't know who gave the idea that it was my boyfriend who hit me, when it wasn't. My boyfriend is the sweetest thing that ever happened to me; very understanding, and he knows about my past, and loves me no matter what. Are you still in unbelief?

True anisa22. Trust me it bothers me sometimes once in a blue moon and only person to help me out to get rid of it are my best friends including my boyfriend.

LOL ASB, you are funny about many kind of prisons.

Thnx, Khilari.

And, thnx for understanding Aroma.

Kamran1, you can think whatever you like, but Allah only knows if I am telling the truth or not. I asked others if they were virgins or not, if they wanted to answer it or not. It's okay if you don't want to answer that if you are a virgin or not. I said it all because it was the truth. What did you expect me to say? That I am not a virgin because I chose not to be? lol! If I was 7, then these guys were 10-15 years older than I. Of course, you loved it Kamran, but one guys were sticking their pen1s' which was not meant for me inside my vagina, I DIDN'T LIKE IT, simple as that.
You may think this is a joke, but if it happens to one of your family members like your sister, daughter, or one of your female or even male members of the family, you will not have time for jokes, but anger, instead.
If I want more of what, Kamran? You are sick! Have you seen a psychologist yet?

[Star]

[quote]Originally posted by KaMrAn1

[

Let me tell u ma story might make u feel betta, wen i was a young boy women used 2 allow me 2 touch dere boobs and other body parts which i wouldnt say it ere, i loved it. If u wanna more plz say

i cant believe some of u guys actually missed Kamran?? i dont know whether he's juz immature or if he's just plain nasty - or tries too hard to be funny - but some of his posts on this place are just plain sick and insensitive

as for paedos - thats the age that these scums operate on.



Mahbuba,


You're story makes me angry and upset at the same time.. it seems like it's not an isolated incident - i used to think the morality back home was better then over here in the west - but seems as tho they're just the same -



i also dont know what to say - telling you to be strong and that you've done no wrong - seem weak offerings against what you've been through - but it's hard to think what you can say to someone who's been thru this - i think all of us (except the clown who posted above) - would wish that we could do something to take away that experience and those nasty memories from you.


i'll juz make dua for your comfort...

as for the scum - their time will come, inshaAllah, Allah is the best of Avengers.

[Marawak_3]

No disrespect Mahbuba, and I'm not calling you a liar, I wouldn't wish what happened to you on anyone. But......

A 6,7,8 year old girl is not ready for things like sex. The pain that would ensue such a situation should have been unbearable and visible to others.

A lot of people have said that the elders would never have believed you.....I think thats bullsh*t....everybody knows that when a woman first has sex, her hymen breaks and she bleeds considerably heavily......definitely way too heavy for any young girl to cover up. Also, the signs of physical trauma would be there, so they would have no choice but to believe you.

[rini_h]

oh ma\hbuba thats the worst thing to happen any girl its just so bad that i cant say. well its just wrong and i realy dont no what you could do because your mommy even didnt beleive it and do anything. but time changes and now you got your boyyfreind that loves you so you should be happy and dont listen to kamran but like evrybody said you look to the furture ok?

[Bang_Ali]

When i was a kid a mullah tried to feel me up, but got the shock of his life when i whacked him in the face. I havent told anyone about this coz i too would have been ridiculed.

It makes me feel so angry when i hear these stories, that i could kill thesse mother f*ckers.

It doesnt matter how long ago this happened, thses bastards need to be punished severely. Cant you tell someone ?? If you were someone i knew, and i knew who thses fiends were, i swear i wouldnt be able to stop myself from skinning them alive.

How do you feel about your mother?? Im sorry to say this, but its parents like her that are partly responsible. She let you down and failed to protect you when you needed her the most.

Its a good thing for you that you can let go, otherwise you it would have burned you out from within.

But still they deserve to be punished , if only just to protect other girls.

And snoop, how could you not go and kick the crap out of the bast*rd that did this to your friend ??

How can you call these w*nkers your mates if you know what they did ??

Im not a violent person, but when i see someone abusing their strength and hurting someone weaker than them (women and kids) then i find it difficult to control myself. How about showing them what it feels like to have a harder/stronger person beat them ?? Break their bones ??

[Bang_Ali]

At the end of the day mahbuba, you must do what is right for you. Your family let you down, dont worry too much about them. Speak out, not only for yourself, but to protect others. I think your very brave for having shared this with us.

Im sorry to have to say this, but your brother is abit of an ass hole too. If it was my sister who was abused, i dont know what id do, but it would be something very nasty, rather than throwing it back in your face.

Anyway Im really glad to see that youve got a great boyfriend who is treating you right.

I think you starting that organisation is an excellent idea.

Good luck.